“24”

Mama Atzi / / No Comments

in or out

What a week of whinging and whining it has been and not just from my teething 1 year old! I spent the last 2 weekends working in the UK and the madness that has grown from one week to the next in regard of the referendum (taking place as we speak!) has been horrendous.

For me, having already cast my overseas vote by post 2 weeks ago, I could breathe a sigh of relief (sort of) and step back to watch the battle from the sidelines but for those that had not yet decided I can only imagine the confusion being dredged up.

The absolute bitterness that has been evoked in some people is shocking and regardless of the outcome tomorrow morning I think Britain has a lot of rethinking to do – whether independently or as part of the EU.

The lies that have been broadcast in relation to “Brexit” are actually ridiculous and the worst part is that people believe them. It worries me that some people are so uninformed and take certain statements as gospel, without further investigation. Not only that but these same people are making noise about something they do not even have the facts over. Trusting tweets and Facebook statements or a single headline in The Express without reading the full story or looking into other accounts to me is unfathomable and yet these people are going to vote today (well, if they actually had the sense to register and put actions to their words) and help change our country forever.

I think most shocking of all has been the way the sickening death of MP Jo Cox has been used, ironically by both sides of the fence, to gain support or knock down others. Whilst she was an avid fighter for the Remain group she was much more than that and though she would perhaps be happy if her death led to others researching her work and voting the same, or opposite, because they have been rightly convinced either way, I don’t believe someone that felt as strongly about politics as she did would want people to vote her way ‘just for the sake of it’.

More importantly though she was a Mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a granddaughter and in her final moments I imagine she saw only the faces of her beautiful children and her husband with whom she shared them. When this madman chose to take away this beautiful person (inside and out from all accounts) I very much doubt her mind was on the upcoming referendum and I think it is an additional tragedy that her final memory was used in such a way.

Yes, it is a scary time. One of unease and uncertainty. Even if we get the result we want no-one really knows for sure what the future holds and we will never know which was the better option because, for right or wrong, the result tomorrow is definitive and can only go one way. There is no going back. We have to move forward. I just hope however we do it we can do it together. I hope this obvious split between us does not fester and cause more hate and fear because we all know who’s hands we are feeding into then and that is a slippery slope. We already live in a world where terrorists are a reality and not just the thrilling storyline on ’24’. We can not give them any ammunition. Whatever the outcome we have to stand together for a Better Britain, a more peaceful world and be strong.

I am by no means a political expert. I read arguments from both sides, researched statistics, considered the opinions of those I know who are more worldly and intelligent than myself and eventually voted based on my own personal experiences and gut instinct.

It shouldn’t come as much of a surprise to hear I voted to REMAIN. I enjoy the simplicity the EU allows when it comes to living and working between my home country and that of my husband. My children are half English, half Austrian and I am happy they can enjoy growing up in a world where their 2 homes are all part of a greater union. I am still proud to be British and I don’t believe this needs to change because we are not ‘completely independent’. In this world of uncertainty I think it is important to have friends. I am not going to go into more details. I certainly don’t want to bias anyone or inflict my opinion on you. This referendum is about everyone in the UK speaking up for themselves and what they believe in. I only hope, whatever you vote, you back your belief up with information from a variety of sources and not just what you have had thrown in your face on social media.

For me it is important to remember migration works both ways so I have voted, not so much for me, but for my children. I want them to grow up in a world where they are free to make their own choices, where travelling around Europe and learning about other cultures is easily accessible. I want my children to be able to fall in love with whoever they choose and to do so without prejudice. I want my children to embrace their neighbours and to be the kind of people that, wherever they go, they will work hard and contribute to the society that has homed them.

I actually have yet to meet a single person who wants to leave, including strangers I have talked to on the plane or in a cafe, but remain or leave I believe there are many people who still share the hardworking values that actually made Britain great in the first place.

A lot of those people are from the EU. Hardworking, lovely people who have done more to contribute to our society than many who were lucky enough to be born in the UK.

I believe in educating my children to be proud of where they come from without taking anything for granted and being accepting and tolerant of others – wherever they come from. I believe in fighting for my country and not blaming others for our supposed downfall.

In less than 24 hours time we will have an answer but IN or OUT my values will not change. I hope for others they do.

 

Sweet Dreams

Mama Atzi x

“I Don’t Know How She Does It”

Mama Atzi / / No Comments

FullSizeRender

Recently I watched the film “I don’t know how she does it” starring Sarah Jessica Parker as a working Mum and I think the title sums up the basic plot.

It’s a must-see for any of us that are trying to juggle a career as well as being the ‘perfect Mum’ and a reminder that no matter how hard we try we will never quite live up to everyone’s expectations. But what I love about this film is that it highlights the fact that, actually, that’s ok. We don’t have to be perfect at either role all the time. We just have to be there. Turn up, do our job to the best of our ability and most importantly know that when all is said and done family has to come first. Because we can say we are working for a better future or life for our children but they aren’t children for long. In a blink of an eye their childhood is gone and if you’re not careful you’ll miss it.

I love the fact that SJP doesn’t give up the job she loves for the family she loves more because as she says “without this job I’m not me” but it does highlight the fact that when you have kids, things change. It’s not easy to adjust to a life where spontaneity is rare and being able to go out for drinks with your girlfriends at short notice is unheard of. Shopping trips involve logistical planning and overpacked bags with enough nappies, bottles and a change of clothes to last the afternoon.

Where romance is being able to watch a whole film uninterrupted or eat a meal with 2 hands and sleeping through the night is the new sex.

For the most part you’re exhausted before you even begin.

Your life is never your own again and that’s why it’s important to hold on to that part of yourself where you perhaps feel a little more successful than you do at home – well sometimes!

But to be a working Mum is to be in a constant battle of yourselves. Black power suit (or whatever you wear for work!) on one shoulder versus puked on, exhausted self on the other. Finding the perfect balance is hard but worth it (I think anyway).

And women do all this under the cloud of a gender bias too. I’m not going to get into that discussion – I’m a dancer so I accepted inequality in the workplace a long time ago but it is there and exists even before we have children because, of course, the assumption is that we all will.

In this world of social media it is easy to show the world how well we do it because only the good stuff is ever shown to the public. We can all be as successful as we want to on paper because who wants to flaunt their failings? No-one really knows what goes on behind our computer screens or how hard it really is. In reality ‘how she does it’ is to wing it most of the time. And that’s why I really enjoyed watching this film because it sums up how I feel every day!

I shared SJP’s excitement of opening her wardrobe to find an outfit that doesn’t have a stain on it.

When asked by a colleague if she has a Rice Krispie on her jacket rather than hide it or just get rid of it she tastes it and then explains ‘ah no it’s just pancake batter’. How many times have I done something similar not even noticing anymore that maybe to those without kids that’s not normal behaviour?! And thank God it did turn out to be chocolate! ?

Like SJP’s character (because I’m sure the real SJP would never do this) I would be the Mum that buys a cake and passes it off as her own. (Although most people know I can’t bake to save my life so that little trick probably wouldn’t stay a secret long!)

I fall asleep choreographing routines and making lists to make lists!!

When she cries because she discovers the babysitter has taken her son for his first haircut I cry with her. And for me that is the most apt part of the film. That even dressed in a smart suit carrying a briefcase and off to her high-powered job in investment banking she is still a Mother and only another Mum can understand the importance of a ‘first hair-cut’ and how heartbreaking it is to miss it. Or any ‘first’ for that matter.

Jobs come and go but from the moment you meet your baby you are a Mama and that’s one role you will never quit – even if there are days you might seriously consider it.

There are people I know who make the juggling of work and Motherhood look not only easy but attractive. As someone who struggles to find the time to get jobs done every day I really don’t know how they do it. I am in constant awe of their time management skills and wish someone would share the secret with me.

Still, when I take a step back I realise I’m not doing quite such a bad job, in either role, as I think. My school is doing well and my boys are healthy and happy. They are surrounded by love and provided with new experiences and opportunities to learn and have fun every day. We have clothes on our backs, a roof over our heads and food in our cupboards, we even managed a family holiday this year. So my house might be a mess, I’m certainly no Nigella Lawson in the kitchen, I still haven’t mastered the German language, I don’t update this blog half as much as I would like and I’m on my phone doing work stuff way too often but when all is said and done I am there when it counts and my boys will always be my first priority (the big one included).

So I might not know how ‘she’ does it but I’ll just keep doing what ‘I’ do and maybe one day someone will say that about me! (Just as long as I never invite them round my house ?)

Sweet Dreams –

Mama Atzi x